This time last year was one of the most exciting times of my life…but it was also the most stressful time of my life. The week leading up to our wedding was such a bizarre and surreal time that I almost feel a little sad that I let stress take over my pre-wedding day experience. As a wedding planner I had put so much energy into ensuring that my brides were stress-free, (after all, that’s what they were paying me for), but when it finally came around to my turn I felt an enormous pressure to ensure that everything was more than perfect. Being the control freak that I
was am, I took on every little detail and every last minute preparation. I reluctantly delegated a few odd jobs here and there, (the ones that I could just about manage to let go of without bringing me out in hives), which resulted in my turning into one hell of a stressedzilla…
Up until this point I had been so calm and collected about the whole process, but in the few days before we were due to say ‘I do’, we were overwhelmed with little annoyances that threatened to disrupt my perfectly planned schedule. It was at this point I realised that- you can’t control everything when it comes to planning a wedding. However meticulously I had planned every little detail, I couldn’t control the groomsmen’s suits arriving in a range incorrect sizes. I couldn’t control guests cancelling on us and having to re-jig the table plan for the seven hundredth time. I couldn’t control getting my dress home and there being a stain on the back of it. I couldn’t control the amount of time it was going to take me to complete the zillion little tasks I had given myself that would all contribute to making our day perfect. I couldn’t control the fact that the jewellers had ordered me the wrong wedding ring. I couldn’t control that when they promised to rectify their error, they then avoided our phone calls for the next 48 hours.
My mind was a whirlwind of labels, gifts, seating plans, playlists, honeymoon packing, plans, schedules, signs, props, buckets, tickets, wedding rings, envelopes, suits, stains, decor, tea lights, string, moss, lists, lists and more lists….I had taken on so much that at one point over the pre-wedding preparation weekend that when I dropped the gifts and some decor to my friends house, I was still in the same clothes I had worn the day before, unsure as to whether or not I’d slept in those clothes, or if I hadn’t even slept at all. I was a mess.
|Rachel and my Mother-in-Law to be…part of my fabulous team of helpers!|
The ring was the only thing I actually cared about at this point. This was the only part of the wedding I would keep with me forever. Everything else would go, or fade, or be forgotten, but my ring would be a permanent reminder of our day. Even though my family kept reassuring me that everything would work out fine, later that day I still found myself sitting in the beauticians, silently sobbing, whilst the manicurist (who couldn’t speak a word of English and probably thought I was a lunatic) kept wiping my face with a tissue as I couldn’t use my hands in case I bodged up my wedding perfect manicure. Now that would have finished me off. Stress does funny things to girls.
|Mum & Nanny May, who tied about 150 glass night lights with string & 100 napkins!|
I remember a conversation I had with a friend who got married a little while after we had and when I mentioned to her that planning my wedding was stressful, she heaved a huge sigh of relief. She thought she’d missed something and that she was the only bride on the planet that hadn’t loved every minute of planning her big day. Na-huh. I was so stressed that in all honesty, 48 hours before our big day, the Hubster and I weren’t even talking to each other. How romantic. It was only when the Hubster turned to me and said, ‘Kate, we’re getting married, not going to a funeral. Cheer up!’ that I knew I had to snap out of it. I had done all I could do up until now, so what would be, would be, as they say…it was time to suck it up and enjoy this experience.
|Emily tying the zillion photographs that took me years to make to create our family tree…
it was a good idea at the time!
So being the helpful little pickle I am, I’ve put together Miss Enchanting’s Tips to Avoiding Pre-Wedding Stress…
Delegate…don’t be afraid to ask for help. Unless your friends and families have their arms stuck on backwards or they are completely useless when it comes to placing things on tables, then make use of these people. The minute I started to let go a little and delegate tasks, I immediately started to relax. Remember, people want to be a part of your special day and its moments like this that bring you closer together.
Contact List…have a contact list for everyone involved in the wedding day, from suppliers to the key members of your wedding party. If anyone has an issue then they are all well equipped to smooth over any problems without your involvement. That’s the idea anyway. Some people are just dippy, but we can’t cover everything.
Make time for Yourself…whether this be a morning at the beauticians, or a long bath reading something un-wedding related, it’s really important that you make time to clear your thoughts and relax. Scheduling some beauty appointments is the perfect way to get you not only looking bride ready, but feeling ready to be a bride. FYI crying at the salon doesn’t get you a discount, it just gets you funny looks.
Write a Checklist…I wrote down everything from my beauty appointments, to wrapping gifts, calling suppliers, to washing my hair and shaving my legs. Anything you think you might forget to do- write it down. It really helps clear the mind and help you plan what needs to be done and in what order of importance.
Eat, Drink, Sleep…and brush your hair and teeth at some point. No one likes a bride with scraggy hair and yellow teeth. Personally I would avoid alcohol, chocolate and processed food in the week leading up to your big day. They only hinder your energy levels and can also leave you with unwanted bloating and irritable skin really close to a day when you want to be feeling your absolute best. Eat well and drink plenty of water to keep your skin hydrated.
Remember what it’s all about…unless you’re in this wedding for an insurance policy or you’re doing it for a bet, then you need to remember why you’re getting married in the first place. Chances are these reasons will have nothing to do with the chair bow colour, type of roses picked or font used on the place cards. All of that is just smoke and mirrors when it comes to a wedding. It’s your marriage to one another that is real. Make time for each other and give each other lots of love and appreciation before your big day. It’s such a magical time and one that you probably wont experience again (unless the above is applicable) so cherish every second. Remember, its a wedding, not a funeral!
|My crazy sisters…stealing the wedding golf buggy!|
And They Lived Happily Ever After…
Thankfully everything worked out in the end.
The amazing bridal shop girls took care of my dress and removed the mysterious stain.
Once we arrived at the venue, the day before our wedding, everything started to fall into place.
My amazing team of helpers swiftly and effortlessly took care of everything.
The suits arrived and they all fit perfectly.
No more guests cancelled.
And three hours before I walked down the aisle, my ring arrived by courier and it was perfect.
|We can laugh about it all now…|
Just remember what it’s all about. The bit where you say I Do.
Do you have any pre-wedding nightmare experiences?
How would you recommend avoiding pre-wedding stress?
Until next time,
With Love & Stress Free Weddings,